The first 29 years of my life were lived without a television in the house. As a teen-ager I didn’t miss TV, but I hated being weird; I was allergic to otherness. One day in high school the teacher decided to do an on-the-spot survey of TV viewing habits. One by one, she queried the class and students gave the hours watched the day before. The usual replies were between two and four hours. I cringed as she came closer to calling on me. Joe Fritz, the guy in front of me, had been sick the day before and figured he watched 8 1/2 hours.
“Carol?” she droned. “How much did you watch?”
I looked a little off to her left and said, “None.”
This threw her off her stride, but evidently interested her. “Wait a minute. Were you not home yesterday?”
I bit the inside of my cheek. “No. I was home.”
“Is your TV broke?”
“Um…no.” [Please, please don't make me admit I don't have a TV] With each question I slid a quarter of an inch lower in my seat. I focused my attention on a spot on the floor.
“Well, how much did you watch the day before?”
Better face the music. Big sigh. I looked up and admitted, “None….we don’t have a TV.”
“You DON”T HAVE A TV?” She searched for a diplomatic way to ask about our financial status.
“Carol, is there a reason your family doesn’t have a TV?”
“Yes there is. My dad doesn’t want one.”
A similar conversation a few years ago made me laugh instead of cringe. I was at my desk at the pharmacy where I work entering numbers on Excel. There were two twenty-something co-workers in the office. One is what my husband calls a Chatty Cathy.
“[celebrity's name] had a baby girl yesterday.”
I kept working and replied, “Oh. Good. [pause] Is she one of our customers?”
Pepsi came spewing out of her mouth as she choked and said, “Carol. You don’t know who [...] is?”
I paused and looked at her. “Should I know who she is?”
The twenty-something intern jumped in. “Don’t you watch Friends?”
“Well, I’ve seen a few minutes here and there, but I’ve never watched an entire episode. I’m sorry, but I’m unfamiliar with [...]“
The shock of it all disoriented them. They shook their heads trying to process the wonder of it. Giggles kept erupting from them over the next half hour. I chuckled, shrugged, smiled, and sat up straighter as I continued with my number crunching.
This is not a screed against watching television.
This is a rant against mindless viewing habits.
Roseteacup’s comment “TV is a thief to be reckoned with” has been reverberating through my week. After we got a TV, the pendulum swung and for a period our viewing diet was omnivorous. We considered getting rid of the TV, but favored controlling it over chucking it. We established (and re-established – you know how slippage happens) some household rules:
1. The kids do not have open access to the TV. They need permission to even turn it on.
2. Watching TV during a meal is a rare exception. There is something precious about eating around a table and talking to one another. When the World Series is on, we’ll eat while watching the game in the living room. It’s fun, but it’s not normal.
3. The TV is never on for background noise. The world is full of beautiful music to listen to. Silence allows you to mull over ideas. Serenity is nigh impossible with a TV on.
4. People always trump programs. When someone knocks on the door the TV goes off. No. matter. what. We honor our visitor by listening and looking at them with our full attention. When we talk on the phone we leave the room if the TV is on.
5. Decide the level of intake in advance. When we’re tired, weary, bored, etc. the default response is not to turn the television on. It grips, it sucks, it scoops you in – but it rarely satisfies.
We have found this to be a part of life which requires regular, systematic evaluation. There are some great shows to watch. But they don’t always remain great shows to watch. Television is a medium which delivers some that is profitable and much that is wretched. Too many times I have watched a program that was substandard, but was too passive, too engaged (or is it disengaged?), to click Off. When I go to a nursing home I notice the comatose habits of the residents in front of the box; I **so** don’t want that to be the way I live life at age 75.
Thoughts? Any yeahbuts?