November 13, 2010
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Missed Calls, Missed Moments
We recently got a new (land line) phone. The first time I answered it, I was alone, unfamiliar with the phone. I looked at the receiver. Which button makes this thing go? I experimented with one, then another, while the shrill, repeating ring-tone made me jumpy and nervous. Finally it stopped. The receiver was cradled in my hands. I stared at it. “I guess I just don’t know how to answer the phone,” I muttered to myself. As from a distant land, a still small voice said, “Carol?” Mirabile! Houston, we have a connection!Here’s what I don’t like about this phone. The display always tells me how many calls I’ve missed. At the moment, I have 4 missed calls. I find this jarring. I’m missing something? I think my subconscious sends me a message that something substandard is happening, like only being able to read to the third line on the eye chart. It also raises the urgency factor. I am aware that for those of you with cell phones this is normal life. I still don’t like it.
Because I’d rather have a message that tells me all the really important things I’m missing. 4 Missed Moments: to tilt your head back and gulp in the windy sunshine. 6 Missed Conversations: with son who clicks away on his computer while you click on yours; with friend who wants more than a breezy hi-bye; with husband eating his breakfast alone; with siblings on the other side of the country. 1 Missed Prayer of thanksgiving. 2 Missed Opportunities to ask for forgiveness.
How many times have I missed the beautiful bits of life? My friend Di writes in this exquisite essay about living with her mom’s terminal diagnosis:
When I walk past sunlight illuminating the edge of an antique white bowl, I stop and appreciate it. I didn’t realize until recently that Mom taught me all I need to know about the beauty to be found in the rim of a bowl, the simple splendor of white shaped round. None of this was spoken, but she has always lived it in whatever circumstances she found herself.
I know all the pros of technology, but I struggle with the cons. Even if the program isn’t open, when a new email arrives a bell dings to let me know. I find it hard to ignore it. I’m plum in the middle of an overflowing fountain of blessings. In real life. My husband and I are experiencing a surge in our love and commitment; my kids are established and thriving; our church community joins in vibrant worship every Lord’s Day; we are connected to dear friends and don’t see our siblings often enough. I have no excuses. Life is pulsing all around me. Four missed calls?The price tags are so easily switched.
Oh to be present. To take the moment, to breathe, to talk, to touch. Lord, help me!
Comments (3)
Half the journey is the recognition of what you want; the second half is setting one foot in front of the other and doing it. I do a lot of “should-ing” to myself, but try not to. Finding pleasure in simpler things is what helps me to let go of the urgent/fascinating world of technology a lot of the time. You have a wonderful life with blessings that God has provided and built to this day–enjoy it!
Oh the metaphor!
Actually, I like this. I was just quoting myself.
Somehow, not quite sure how, I seem to have managed to turn off my email “dinger”. What a blessing